Why do Japanese people say they feel sorry for the victims?
Sorry for the inconvenience.
During the Great East Japan Earthquake in 2011, her grandmother was swept away by the tsunami and was drifting aimlessly at sea. Surprisingly, the first words she said after being rescued were "I'm sorry for the inconvenience I caused you."
The parents of a Japanese journalist who was kidnapped and killed by IS (Islamic Sunni armed group) in 2015 were also interviewed and said, "I am sorry for causing inconvenience to my child."
There is one more interesting fact about the Japanese. Riding with strollers is proudly listed among the subway nuisances announced by the Japan Private Railway Association. Surprisingly, the results showed that riding with a stroller is a more uncomfortable behavior than littering or drinking.
This shows that Japanese people are not very tolerant of others, not even of babies.
Let’s look at an experience in Japan. As I was riding the subway, the baby in the stroller started crying.
Then, as if they had made a promise, the passengers' eyes instantly turned to the baby's mother and the stroller. The baby's mother was visibly anxious and kept saying 'sumimasen (sorry)' to people.
Eventually, she got off the train with her stroller when it stopped at the next station. Why did the baby's mother in Japan panic and become anxious when her baby cried?
Because she thinks that other people, that is, she herself, are a nuisance to the group. Why was she reluctant to cause trouble to the group? The reason is that she is afraid of being bullied.
In fact, according to a 2013 survey by Japan's Ministry of Land, Infrastructure, Transport and Tourism, 42% of Japanese people responded that it was "unpleasant" to see passengers riding without folding their strollers when the interior of a means of transportation is crowded. On the other hand, Korea only accounted for 8%.
What if it was Korea? What would it have been like if this same situation had occurred in Korea?
Even if the baby cried, all passengers' eyes wouldn't have turned to the stroller, the baby's mother wouldn't have been anxious and apologized to people, and she wouldn't have gotten off at the next station.
In Korea, if a baby cries too loudly and the baby's mother gets off at the next station with her stroller, she is not doing so because she is afraid of reprimand or punishment from her group.
She is most likely trying to be considerate of others or to soothe her baby. Koreans, like Japanese, value others and groups. In other words, Koreans are also collectivist. However, the reasons for prioritizing groups are different from the Japanese.
If the reason why Japanese people prioritize groups is because of the fear of being ostracized by the group, the reason why Koreans prioritize groups is because they want to be considerate of others.
Simply put, while Japanese people are forced to prioritize groups because they are afraid of groups and others, Koreans voluntarily prioritize groups.
The same is true for the victims of the Great East Japan Earthquake and IS kidnapping and murder mentioned above.
What would she say if she were a Korean grandmother? She probably started by thanking the rescue team, government, and people for their efforts to rescue her.
What would you say if you were a Korean parent? She probably expressed gratitude to the people who shared her grief and comforted her, and to the people and government who worked to rescue her child.
Or, he would have just cried in front of the viewers, and the viewers would have cried along with him while watching that scene.
When a government or rescue team saves a person, Koreans are thrilled and feel grateful to the group or others who saved them, considering it as the group's love for them.
When media outlets interview Koreans who have suffered disasters, Koreans view the rescue efforts as the people's (group's) interest and consideration for them, and express gratitude to the viewers (group) who want to share their pain and sorrow.
Even if they make a lot of concessions, Koreans will never think of causing trouble to the group or others like the Japanese.
Japanese people consider it a nuisance that they are unable to properly perform the social roles assigned to them. For example, I think it is a nuisance that one cannot find a job even after graduating from college.
This shows that Japanese people are not just afraid of being harmed by the group or others, but are also afraid of not properly performing the social role that the group imposes on the individual.
In short, Japanese people are very afraid of group scolding or punishment.
Japanese people are fake model students
The reason why Japanese people are afraid of groups is because their collectivism is fake collectivism. I have long emphasized the need to distinguish between true model students and fake model students when analyzing an individual's psychology.
To put it simply, a true model student is someone who voluntarily complies with moral norms based on conscience, while a fake model student is someone who is forced to comply with moral norms out of fear of punishment (or loss of love). Both real and fake people adhere to moral standards, but their inner motivations are completely different.
A true model student not only does not find it difficult to comply with moral standards, but actually enjoys it. This is because one adheres to moral norms because one truly likes and wants to do so.
On the other hand, fake model students find it very difficult to comply with moral standards and feel resentful. Moreover, they live in fear, worried that they might be punished for failing to follow moral standards.
If Korean collectivism is a true model student, then Japanese collectivism can be said to be a fake model student. In other words, Japanese collectivism is fake collectivism.